"Don't let my doubts prove true
Draw me close and hold me near to you
Keep me still until the day you
Cast out my doubts, please prove me wrong
'Cause these demons can be so headstrong
Make my walls fall, please prove me wrong
'Cause this resentment's been building
Burn them up with your fire so strong
if you can before I bail, please prove me wrong"
this is what i'm praying today. in my heart, i know that i don't doubt who He is or that He's up to good. But in my head, in my small, small world, i sometimes doubt. there's a piece of me that feels like bailing - not on God, not on what i believe in, but on sacrifice. i want to bail on moving out and working at church and just get a job - it would ensure that i am comfortable and complacent - things that i want but i know God doesn't want them for me. so that's why i pray for the doubt to be cast out... for eternal perspective... to be held near to Him in transition and questions. Yahweh, remind me that it's worth it, every bit of it is worth living a life of surrender, remind me of that today...