i'm going to be brutally honest with you today, i knew this would be one of the harder ones for me, but i also knew it would be a good challenge. you see, when you live in orange county where everyone gives the appearance of being "put together" 90% of the time, you fall into the trap of thinking you also can't leave the house with 48029385045 layers of mascara and every flaw covered up with concealer. and i realized that the last couple months i have fallen prey to that mentality - that what God made my face to look like isn't enough. interesting how quickly our mind tries to convince us.
*now before i continue, i must put this disclaimer out there that lipgloss (or at least the one i use) doesn't count as makeup, so when i say no makeup, i am very likely still wearing lip gloss. don't judge me or try to convince me otherwise, this is just the way i roll. i'm rarely lipgloss-less, but have decided it's better than being addicted to something more harmful. :)*
so i have been doing this makeup-less-ness once a week for the last few weeks and it has been really good for me. the thing is when you leave the house you're TOTALLY aware that you have no makeup on so sunglasses are appropriate, even inside a building ;) for the first hour or so. but then you forget and you are just you - make up or no make up, you are still you.. the one day i chose last week, i happened to run into approximately 6 people from church i haven't seen in a long time. initially i was totally aware of it, but after about 10 minutes, i was just me. and i'm pretty certain that even if they noticed, they weren't thinking, "what's her problem? why would she go out without makeup on?"
so here's the deal...
with no make up on (and a darling girl to hang out with)
or with loads of make up on (and bridesmaid duties to perform)
i. am. still. me.
now i may look 12 without it, i may feel not as pretty without it, but that doesn't change how God sees me, how i should see myself or even necessarily how others see me. i have a feeling that as i continue to do this, i will be writing another post about it, but it's in full effect and there are days when it's hard for me. i said it. there are days when i literally have to force myself not to wear makeup because i genuinely feel like people will look at me differently if i don't. i'm working on not believing this lie and believing that who my God created me to be is just plain good enough. a work in progress for sure.
and speaking of progress...5/30 - 1/6 of the way there. movin' right along...